Uno Uno

[With full apologies to David Bowie; this just isn't the same without that great
riff playing behind it]

Put Westminster in a whirl;
Won the heart of this beagle girl.
Hey Dawg, your coat's alright.
Hey Dawg, we're so proud tonight.

You won big, and we love it, oh.
Feel like dancing 'cause you did so fine.
Those priss breeds gonna take it hard.
You won top dog; their world is jarred.

They’ve put us down, in verse and song.
You beagle king, you proved them wrong!

Uno, Uno, you passed the test.
Uno, Uno, a beagle won Best.
Uno, Uno, you showed them all!
Hero, stand proud and tall!

Vegas had us with bad odds.
Four hundred to one? Ye gods!
Oh no, that's every one!
O ho, us did they shun!

But we knew, and now they do, too.
Beagles rule, especially you.
Terriers are now in shock;
Breeders swoon and call for a doc.

You hung tough, and got the top.
Judge did point, and jaws did drop!

Uno, Uno, we are so proud.
Uno, Uno, you howled out so loud,
Uno, Uno, when you were picked.
Hey wait, why aren't you ticked?

Uno, Uno, beagles still rule!
Uno, Uno, and others all drool!
Uno, Uno, future's so bright!
Hot damn! Wang Chung tonight!

You passed their test,
A beagle got best!
We all knew the truth,
But the truth is now blessed!

(You got the) Top trophy, such a live wire!
(Got the) Pig ears as my queenly tribute!
(You gonna) Receive the Order of Snoopy Dudes!

Cause you passed the test!
You're a beagle king success!
And their world is a mess!
Cause now they must know!
How can they not know?

So what should I send,
To start a gift trend?
You ought to run and howl,
And be fed spotted owl!
Just ignore the greens' yowl.

Cause you passed the test!
And you have earned a rest!
They named you the best!
So now they all know!
How can they not know?