Perlie's Big Brown Pig Ear

Perlie's Big Brown Pig Ear


(With sincerest apologies to Les Claypool and all the guys in Primus)


Now Perlie's loves herself a big brown pig ear
And she wants to keep it all herself.
One day, you know, she had to have a pig ear
So she snuck it off the high treat shelf.

Along came Beau, a-movin' kinda slow,
And said "Recognize that smell?
A pig ear! Oh boy! My favorite!
It even beats Taco Bell!"

Now Beau's a galumpher with an unclean ear
Who likes to snuffle out other folk's grub.
He'll eat up your lunch, with one big munch.
He'll chew a shoe down to a nub.

Beau got wind of the big brown pig ear,
So he thought he'd take himself a bite.
But Perlie was quick and snapped at his floppy ear
And he jumped in suborbital flight.

So Perlie took her big brown pig ear
And she hid it under our big bed.
Said "I sure to love this big brown pig ear,
And I'll chew it till my mouth is red."

Now Perlie stayed down there for seven hours
And it got us all worried a-might.
So I patted her head and gripped on the pig ear
And the little **** tried to bite.

Now Perlie loves her big brown pig ear
And she chews it up all the time.
One day she had to potty so
She hid it in the needles under the yellow pine.